


Here for You

by glitterandtears6



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Caring Phil Lester, Cute Dan Howell/Phil Lester, Dan Howell - Freeform, Depressed Dan Howell, Depression, Fluff and Angst, Love, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-02
Updated: 2019-12-02
Packaged: 2021-02-24 15:40:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 511
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21640318
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/glitterandtears6/pseuds/glitterandtears6
Summary: Dan's having a bad depression day.
Relationships: Dan Howell & Phil Lester, Dan Howell/Phil Lester
Comments: 2
Kudos: 44





	Here for You

Dan was in a… mood. That’s all Phil could say. His boyfriend was currently lying face-first on the couch (it had been the floor, but Phil convinced him to move) crying.

“Babe, let’s go for a walk.”

Dan shook his head and said, in a muffled voice, “I don’t wanna be seen. I’m a fucking mess.”

Phil sighed sadly and sat next to Dan. “You’re not a mess, you have clinical depression.”

“Clinical depression,” Dan repeated mockingly. “I’m a failure. No one even cares.”

Phil knelt next to where Dan’s head lay on the couch. “Enough.” He ran a hand through Dan’s curls. “Look at me.” He waited for a moment before repeating himself. “Dan, look at me.”

Dan turned towards him with a groan.

“I love you. You know that. I care. Your millions of fans do, too, although never as much as I do. I don’t expect you to feel better right now, but please understand that this is not your fault. You’re depressed, of course you’ll feel bad. I’m here, though, and I’m going to take care of you.” He watched Dan for a while, hoping his words had gotten through to him. “I think we should go for a walk.”

“I can’t,” Dan replied simply.

Phil laid a hand on Dan’s. “What’s stopping you?”

“Getting dressed, eating breakfast, brushing my teeth, standing up.”

“Well, you only have to do one of those things, and I’ll help you. C’mon.” He stood up and held out his hands. Very slowly, Dan rolled over and grabbed Phil’s hands, letting them pull him up. “There you go. I think this’ll be good, okay?” 

With intertwined hands, the pair left their apartment and started down the sidewalk, Phil chattering absently. When they got to a park bench, Dan stopped. “Can we take a break?”

“Definitely.” Phil led Dan to the bench and sat down next to him, smiling softly. “How do you feel?”

Dan sighed. “Shitty. But… better, thanks to you.”

Phil grinned. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.” 

Phil knew that was sometimes hard to say for Dan during depressive episodes, and he was happy. He reached up and ran his fingers through Dan’s hair to test the waters. After meeting no negative response, he leaned over and kissed him. “I’m proud of you.”

At this, Dan chuckled halfheartedly. “You don’t have to say that, Phil. I’m a disaster right now.”

“No, Dan, I am. I hate seeing you go through this, it fucking sucks, but you’re pulling through. I can see it. I’m really, really proud of you, okay?”

Dan nodded, then his eyes started to well up with tears. “Phil, what did I do to deserve you?”

There was a long pause. “I ask myself the same about you every day.” Phil wrapped his arm around Dan’s waist and leaned into him. When he felt Dan start crying harder, he rubbed his back. “It’s okay, it’s going to be okay.”

And for the rest of the day, Dan lived off of those words.

“It’s going to be okay.”


End file.
